Damon Davis on 279 Adoptee Interviews, Two New Books, and Being "a Branch on Someone Else's Family Tree"

adoption trauma damon davis disconnection mirroring reunion same-race adoptee trauma understanding adoption Sep 24, 2026

Julie sits down with Damon Davis - creator and host of the Who Am I Really? podcast, author of the memoir by the same name, and the MC behind the Adoption: The Making of Me live event series. Damon brings a rare vantage point to this conversation: he's a same-race domestic adoptee, a father through kinship adoption to two of his children, and a biological father to his son, Seth. Rather than retracing his own well-told story, Julie and Damon go underneath it - into what nine years and 279 interviews have taught him about the parts of adoption that stay unseen.

They talk about "mirroring" and what it means to grow up in a family that looks like you but still doesn't reflect you back. They talk about the layered, sometimes contested nature of adoption trauma, and the soundboard of "sliders" Damon uses to describe just how different every adoptee's experience can be. And they talk about the two books Damon is now writing out of his interviews - one on growing up in adoption, one on the reunion journey - and what he hopes each one gives back to the adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive parents who read it.

In This Episode

- Who Damon is, and how Who Am I Really? grew into 279 episodes over nine years.

- What "mirroring" means for a same-race adoptee, and the assumptions people make when an adoption "doesn't show".

- Becoming a father through kinship adoption to two of his children, alongside the arrival of his biological son, Seth.

- Why he sees adoption trauma as layered rather than singular, and the "soundboard of sliders" he uses to describe the adoptee experience.

- The deepest unseen impact he's heard across almost 300 interviews: disconnection, and the quiet ache for acknowledgment even without full reunion.

- The two books being written from those interviews, who he most wants them to reach, and what he's still wrestling with as he writes

- MCing Adoption: The Making of Me live events across the country, and what shifts when a room full of adoptees processes a story together

Call to Action

If this one landed for you, sit with it for a minute before you move on to whatever's next in your day. And if this podcast has meant something to you, a five-star review - or even a few written words - helps this work reach more adoptees, and more of the people who love them.

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Resources & Links Mentioned

- Who Am I Really? podcast - On all platforms

- Who Am I Really?: An Adoptee Memoir

- Updates on Damon's two forthcoming books

- Adoption: The Making of Me - live event series Damon MCs; next stop Los Angeles, created by Sarah Reinhardt and Louise Brown

- Big Happiness Documentary by Dahee Kim here

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Website

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Facebook: julierasbrum